Sensitise, don't sensationalise... Please! The world has enough controversies.

Supposedly, a lot of hearts broke when malayalam actor Prithviraj got married. It's all over the news now, so I don't think a detailed intro on what happened is required. It's just that he got married to his girlfriend in a private ceremony, just after famously answering few marriage related questions in a popular magazine. He clearly clarified in a TV interview, what the questions were, and how the answers he gave were to the point and right - and not misleading to any sensible reader or journalist, and also did not hesitate to apologise to anyone who did not feel good about the entire episode.


The question that remains is, why did the famously sensible Keralites make a big deal out of it. He was criticized on every possible medium - right in the blogs to a magazine cartoon strip to Youtube. Let me make this clear - I seriously admire this talented, sensible, committed  youngster actor and understand the borderline of private and public life, though he is a celebrity - and I'm not one amongst the heart-broken lot. I'm writing this just to find out why a big deal was made out of someone's clearly private affair, when it has no connection whatsoever to the expectations he has to fulfill, as an actor and youth icon.


Star admirers across the globe act silly when it comes to few such instances, and a celebrity is ofcourse considered a public property, and by impulse you're bound to feel a little less-cared-for. But, what's with the media? Yes they should report that the fans are upset but what's their contribution in sensitising the public,  by just sensationalising the event and feelings, rather than drawing a clear line to educate the public on what they should stop being upset about, and how it just degrades you?


If Keralites still act silly reacting to such events, if they're still unclear as to where not to intrude in to do moral policing, if they still are narrow minded and not let in changes easily - and all this despite being the best educated lot, media for sure is one of the key reasons. Just like how PM Manmohan Singh cleverly blew off a stupid controversy on Shashi Tharoor's 'cattle class' tweet as a joke, media should act as peace promoters and maturity builders, and stop making a mountain out of a molehill-event. An editorial on how an event gives us a chance to show off our maturity, a cartoon strip or comical piece on how some things are to be taken light heartedly, can work wonders.Professional and citizen journalists can equally play a part in this yet-to-be-taken-seriously initiative.  In this turbulent age, what else is the best philantrophic act than distributing ideas of peaceful co-existance and understanding?

How white lies help!

Honesty is ofcourse the best policy, mostly. But how far does it help in situations which are, a lot of times, not ideal? In the sense, in those moments and instances, where the one you're talking to cannot understand why you did, said, or believe something, upon the truth informed?


Let me put it straight - not everyone can take everything. Weren't there moments in life where your parents freaked out upon learning your actually-harmless, freaky adventure? Wasn't your boyfriend upset that you did not call him at 10:00 pm dot?  Didn't your friends feel bad that you did not turn up for an event for which you promised you would, just because your mood wasn't right to be in a crowd and nothing else? These or similar ones, happen in everyone's life. 


Your parents-friends-boyfriends-whoever your dear and near are, are expected to understand your situation and mentality for sure. But how often does this 'ideal thing' happen? Weren't there instances where one, harmless, no -strings- attached whitelie would have saved the situation and brought smiles to the faces? Oh come-on there were!


Get this clear guys - that the line between a whitelie and actuality is not very thin. All you've to do is add in the right expression and tone to it - afterall, all the world is a stage and we're actors on it, and we're there not to create chaos but bring in happiness. 


For eg; if your boyfriend calls upset that you didn't call him at 10:00 - and your reason is that what you wanted to do was pubbing - go into a safe corner and tell him "I so sorry honey, got caught up in a hurriedly fixed cross timezone meeting! Will call you soon after that, muah! Unless your boyfriend is your office team mate, or is pubbing in the same place, or a 'True lies' kinda spy, this is enough to cool him down. Just see to it that your excuse sounds soothing and situationally correct, and the background noise doesn't contradict it! 
Through this excuse, was any harm done to him? No, believe me, unless your relationship is already on the rocks, were this or more is the expected behaviour. I'm talking about saving moments, situations, just to have some peace and deal with differences, where the actual togetherness is sweet, minus some white-lie-handled conflicts.


Having a blood relationship of any kind of relationship do not assure same wavelength in thinking. All it gives is the mutual care and concern, which comes out as love, but sadly intruding into the breathing space it requires. Just toss one of this, and your life is peaceful. Believe me, the beneficiaries of the skill are the ones who prompted me to jot it down. 

Tailpeace: It's up to you to believe me or not whether this is a whitelie. What really matters is whether you care to try this out, or whether you are really bothered at all!

Crank calls?

Disclaimer - Aimed at many who still exist, not knowing how to deal with crank callers, but want to. Those who deal with them but the wrong way - and want to or don't want to get rid of it, those who don't understand why it's not healthy to entertain these calls mostly, and also those who deal with them smartly or beg to differ with my views - are all welcome to respond, if you feel you have a helpful  bit to add. 

Let me go straightaway to what to do with them - by putting down what I do with them - which I believe, is the simplest remedy. I save the numbers as 'Salyam (which translates to disturbance, in malayalam). I found it as the right malayalam decent word to refer to anyone who's nothing more than a nuisance and has nothing worth to tell you - and the mere mention of it or it flashing on your mobile screen would create the right attitude towards the caller in your mind, instantly. So, the key I believe, is to save the numbers under a category named powerful enough to set up the right mental feelings, and just pressing the reject button upon seeing their call.


A well-known mistake made by many is picking up the call and letting out vigourous expletives at the caller, who is nothing else but getting just entertained in the process. Some of them just want a response. The intend is mostly malicious. May be there are a handful of people who're lucky in life that a 'missed-call-buddy' transformed into a life-long bestfriend or partner or whatsoever, keep reminding yourself -  statistics show that a lot of people were cheated. Their life got doomed for ever. Their future got affected. And the ratio of them to the lucky ones is huge, beyond compare. 


Do not save the number in the name of the person. Some soft minds would start shaking, seeing how badly some bugger wants to talk to you, and give in. This is why I tell you, create a category for it. Once you're convinced that the person is not doing you any good, just push him in there and all you would know when such a call flashes is, it's one of them - and they're nothing but a nuisance. 


Dear innocent readers, cluelessers, try this for a while. You'd a earn a skill for life, save a lot of time, and what more, discourage someone out there who gets the message , may be, right, and who knows, may be initiate a positive change!

Fit and fine

Let's call the GenNow girl, Ammu. In a small Kerala town, Ammu grows up,  appreciating pot belly as a prosperity indicator, and cardiac arrest, a glamourous red carpet to death. Ammu's parents feed her to the brim, chanting 'eat eat my child how thin you are'. The mantra gets synchronised to Ammu's heartbeat, registers her look as 'petite-thin', encouraging a growing appetite. Afterall, she needs extra nutrients to be a complan girl!


While at college, Ammu and friends were bothered more in the lines of 36-24-36 ( more about the 36 bit as 24 was easily unachievable by most).Only a few 'on-the-verge-of-obesity' chubbies, who couldn't feel confident wearing body-hugging tops and stand cold stares were bothered about slimming down. 
"Thank god I'm thin". Ammu thinks. "Molu are you eating properly in the hostel-oh, poor child'' ravings from the caring lot made Ammu feed herself more, and the complan-appetite helped as always. Moreover, 'Hostel food sucks!' statement becomes a great excuse to eat outside food, get umpteen pickle-jam-chips bottles, intrude into dayscholars classmate's tiffins, and moreover, pump in all mom-made stuff every trip home, assisted lovingly by mamma mia.


Ammu gets placed in an MNC after college and is to join  in a month's time. Overflowing  emotions makes mommie  feed daugter  umpteen kgs. 'I pray that you get good food there' she muttered and follows up with a thoughtful prayer 'Alphonsamme don't make her thin'


Realization strikes somewhere - 'don't make her thin?!?!?  As in?


Reality-check gets blocked by yummy smelling food as always, until Ammu lands in the trendy-brainy Hi tech city.  Her collegues never seem to be eating as much she does,  and goes to the loo only to gossip, being not having anything to empty. 


Ammu eats all 4 times, and wonders why others around only nibbled on toasted bread. A casual inquiry one day gets answered 'Oh, so that I slim down... but I love your attitude! You don't mind being chubbie eh?  .... this from a girl who did not seem to have an ounce of fat in her body!


 'Me... chubby?'  Thought provoker!


A proper analysis in the mirror back in the apartment sends ammu on a guilt trip. She had never spotted those flabs before... that double chin! And Oh-god the thunder thighs suffocating within the jeans!


'Mommie did you ever realize you had turned me into a fattie!' she screams over phone.


Painstakingly, Ammu decides to reduce her appetite and workout, and sets the lose weight goal.  Applauded by her colleagues, she kick starts her diet-workout regime. Few weeks pass by...


 'Ammu! You look pulled down and fabulous'- says one. " Oh you look toned.." goes another. Ammu sasheyed down the office floor feeling super good. Time passing by, Ammu losing weight on and off but not beyond a point..." the Alphonsamma effect hmm", Ammu thinks. 


Diet followed, on and off. Inmates interested, on and off. Body too responded, on and mostly off. But guess who was consistent? "Oh you've grown your prosperous potbelly back' followed by a smirk,by one of the usual commentators, ... 'Oh dear not exercising of late?, another...


 "How I wish these idiots took a look at my battle to keep away from temptations,  take myself to the gym, and get my body narrow down a bit!"  said, Ammu's mind and "Oh hehe thanks", said Ammu! And seeing the pic send by her home, for a prospective marriage party, mommie wailed in through phone "oh god you're starving yourself--the guy's mother said you look tired and worn out ( not to mention that the guy asked Ammu to slim down further if she doesn't mind) aren't you eating anything? "


Crisis! So, "what am  I to look like?" A flabby prosperous-looking chubbie impressing the moms - or a 'preferrably as thin as possible' new gen girl,  or just someone who doesn't bother about it and eats and exercises just right? The answer should impress me and my GenX, the mommie gen, and my health plus temptations!" Tough, I tell you Ammu!

How virus saved my life!

My school days, is that part of my life which I always feel like getting back to. T he fun I had, the few friends I had, my teachers, the corridors, play ground, school bus, the auditorium, drinking water tap, the chapel... every corner of it has atoms of my sweet memories lying in there. It laid the foundation to who I'm today - good or bad - but I love it for all it gave me, especially skills and memories related to acquiring them.

Quizzing was always, one of my passions, and what I gained from every single quiz I went for in my life, is priceless. A titbit was as priceless as winning a prize, and being in the audience as exciting as being up there in the dias facing questions. But it is only once, that I felt I would be killed, literally, if I don't win a prize. The mentral trauma I went through while participating in this particular quiz, and the minor cardiac arrests I got every time I got an answer wrong or passed, are all exciting and memorable in hindsight, but when I was there, real and raw - I thought of it as the worst quizzing experience I'd ever have.

And the culprit was no body else, but my teammate! It was just me and him who were representing our house, and this guy was reputed as an innocently snobbish brilliant brat. Right from the moment we got on the dias, I could see how he sweated it out to dominate the quiz.

The joy of quizzing, also lies in shooting in the dark, guessing an answer which would or would not work, inventing 'blunderful' answers, as much as getting them right. However, the brat beside me did not seem to be in a mood to have entertainment through knowledge, but just wanted to get it all right!

Everytime I attempted an answer and got it passed or wrong-not that I was doing it frequently-he kept on muttering in my ears 'I told you-  I told you - I knew that wasn't the answer - Oh god the next team is 5 points ahead of us - be careful be careful'... and imagine having to attempt a question with confidence, with these rumblings in your ears! If it was the me of now over then, I would have asked him to 'SHUT UP' or 'PLAY IT COOL' in a nano second, but alas, I was just a just-in-high school girl while I timidly went through this.
Nevertheless, we managed to get quite a lot of answers right. Both of us contributed - let me state it LOUD AND CLEAR - though our Mr. killjoy exuded an air of 'Hmph-I-did-it-all' sitting near me. Despite a good show by our team, as though the tortures I went through weren't enough, our scores got tied with another team after all rounds were over. And the quiz master decided to break it through a buzzer round. Alas... I was living dead.

Quiz master announced, he would ask a single question. Whoever presses the buzzer first, and gets it right, would be declared the winner. And if we get it wrong, the other team wins. A typical tie breaker round which I would have excitedly, light heartedly, sailed through if I wasn't with the bugger. But here I was, all trembling and sweating and my heart pounding loud.

We were asked to keep our palms right above the buzzer  - and seeing that I was keeping myself one mile away from it and letting my team mate place himself above it, the quiz master asked me to sit close! Mr. bugger and me had our hands half-half above the buzzer now. My mind started the count down to get this finished, and was solely concentrating on that alone.  But my body wasn't away from the quizzing dias yet.

"What is the study of virus called?" Out came the question and I hear the buzzer getting pressed... and it took an alarming moment to register it was my hand, which pressed the buzzer, and that too to a question's answer which I had no clue of... my body had betrayed my mind! My team mate's eyes were burning enough to turn me into ash, the quiz master's and audience'  eyes were intently fixed on me, and the other team had their hearts pounding and sincerely praying I get it wrong.

My mind was clueless and blank... all I felt like is adding an 'ology' to whatever is studied - which is a general tactic by all, and live the last moment of my life on the dias, all set to get slaughtered in the assured defeat which I could see in front of my eyes.

From a dead mind and dry mouth, out came an answer - "errr... virology" It was sooo obvious that it was a guess work.

I guess the quiz master was tempted to take  us on an 'are you sure-so the answer to the question iiiiis' playfully- tense ride, but seeing my dead face, he gave up. And all he said is 'She is right! and team Alpha is the winner of the year' The applause that followed sounded like the new showers on a deep-dry desert patch... It took a moment for me to be back into life though my heart was still beating hard... Just that it felt like a light drum-roll now :)

The tormentor beside me got transformed into an appreciater, and the happenings around me in the next few minutes resembled a rain dance! I couldn't belive that virus actually saved my life and my body betrayed me for my own best! Narrating this as my incredible quizzing experience I ever had, has never bored me or my listeners - I swear. Some things happen the way they do so that you can look back at them and let out a sigh of relief... and ofcourse this ranks no. 1 amongst those, in my life.

First flight journey

As I entered the waiting lobby, for the last time I looked back and waved at my family… I could see vaguely the eyes turning moist, the smiling faces giving way to gradual teary eyed sad faces… with mixed emotions in my heart, I pretended that I did not see that change, and walked ahead… I am very good at escaping emotions and doing the  ‘alllz well’ drama to my own self… I drag the mental cursur to the ‘Edit’ button of the brain, ‘Click—dropdown—Change mode to insensitive and I’m good to go! I have a well – programmed and thoroughly updated emotional department in my brain – once the settings are made, they generally don’t betray me. 


People resting on the couches awaiting flights, some running to the loo in the last minute, well-groomed and chic ground staff busy giving instructions… I was excited to see what it is like, in an airport waiting lobby. It was my first flight journey!


I was flying to Hyderabad, to join a reputed company, for my first job, straight out of college. Free flight ticket to Hyderabad was the most attractive element in the offer letter, and the one that caught all eyes and ears the most!


After the thrill-filled wait in the lobby where I tried my best to spot another face which might be sharing the same emotions within – so that I could see whether it’s the same for all – it was announced that my flight wants us to proceed to board it. Each step of mine, in the queue, to board the flight seemed shouting out loud – the small steps in a day, leading to a great experience for a lifetime!  First day in school and college,  the first date, first night after marriage, first day in a job, first time inside a flight… these experiences are priceless and  can’t be repeated… they come and go in a hurry, leaving a lasting imprint in the mind... 


The seat belts looked so chic, the reading light and back rest of the seat quite unique, the travellers quite  high class with ‘I fly everyday and I’m reading or sleeping to kill my time’ look on their face. I realized my excitement yet again while the airhostess gave me her perfect professional smile and guidance on where my seat is. 


Ohhh wow… I smugly placed myself on the comfy  seat… clapped-in the seat belt,  leaned relaxingly pushing the back rest behind, took a wide look at the happenings, faces, and everything around which were registered ‘new’ by my brain, and after a few minutes,  slowly closed my eyes… Wahh… I wanted to  store it within myself fresh with all emotions, imprints and the aura with the full and real-time aroma of the moments…
The storing process got shaken and disturbed a bit by a ‘thud’ which happened in the seat beside me… Aahh, heavy ass... my mind assessed.


Beside me was seated an executive-looking, middle aged business lady, who was talking on phone, while getting herself and her stuff placed in the right places. " A frequent traveller for sure", my mind couldn't leave the 'impression-making' mode. I thought for a second about befriending her and talking about random flight stuff... but chucked it seeing her heavily occupied with her phone business. 


And that moment was about to happen... the take-off moment! The moment the plane started moving in the run way, my heart too started racing along and the moment it took off... I felt like Icharus - yes I did, but wasn't over confident like him anyway :P )


But I guess I looked like a new century version of him, with mouth and eyes wide open as the plane went uuup in the sky. I think I also looked quite dumb, coz when I turned left with a face dripped in ecstatic smile, what I saw was an amused co-passenger in that woman. And she was so amused, that she couldn't really help having the expression on her face and having an eye contact with me :P


"It's my first flight journey" came out of my mouth, and her instant reaction was "I can see that' laced with an "it's ok baby" smile. Well, may be she was reminded of her own, memories down the lane... 


The light blue sky with cotton bundle clouds gave way to desert-looking afternoon high skies, all red and grey and brown and yellow... differnt shades merging into each other without conflict, but perfect unison, as though showing unity in diversity... and the side wing of the air plane looked like it's paddling through the evening stream, wanting to reach it's destination but not wanting to leave the beautiful way behind... The high skies brought out the long hidden urge in me to mix colours in a palate, dip a paint-thirsty brush into them, make strokes of it on a white patch... and try recreating a piece of the perfect nature I was wading through...
The sights outside and inside the airplane were equally spell binding, though one was beautifully extremely wonderfully natural, and the other - artificial but wonderful once-in-a-lifetime experience, which too I din't wanna miss...


I also cannot forget my first-time fork and spoon experience that I had high up the sky, my ears getting pricked due to pressure difference, the airloo experience, the afternoon sky paving way deepening shades for the night sky, the hyderabad I saw from up there - well lit like a city of festivity, the smooth gliding down of the plane, me with the plane touching the rough hyderabad airport run way... and what not... every moment was savoured like a tempting delicious new dish, which engulfs you in it's unforgettable aroma, even after it's done... Incredible and one of a kind indeed!


After that trip, I should confess, no other flights of mine had even 1% excitement of it, except the first time I booked the airticket home-went to the airport-did the check in- and boarding, all myself - which was another first to my credit. 


Otherwise, I easily got bored, and mostly the thrill  of either going back home for a vacation or the joy of coming back to my apartment and life in Hyd subdued the in-flight feelings... But just the memory of the first flight still gives me goosebumps, and brings a sweet memory-laden smile to my face... The charm of the experience is as fresh as dew, every time I narrate it, think about it...

'Moving in' with transformation

The first day at my flat was the most memorable day of my life there. Yes, we - 5 girls working in the same company - moved in, with all saaman, and decided as to who stays in which room. I and Bhagya were to share the first bedroom, and Mitra and Sandy took the other one. Mitra’s friend and my college mate Lima, who had just landed in Hyd chose to stay alone in the living room.


The flat was unfurnished, which meant we won’t be given a single piece of furniture. However, the landlord left a few chairs and a table for us, which were already there in the house, as he didn’t have another place to dump them. While I unpacked and was busy setting up the new place of stay, Sandy and Mitra had gone out house-shopping. They returned with mattresses, pillows, buckets, cleaning liquids, brooms, a few utensils, hot plate to cook food, rice-vegetables-masala packets, and a mat for me to sleep on.


“I don’t understand how you’d sleep on a mat… Bhagya exclaimed” I have lived and slept in enough hostel rooms… pat came my reply, laced with a smile. “So have I, but won’t you feel cold?” She was concerned. “No, I’ll be OK” and so was I, all the years that I spent in Hyd. I still have the memory-laden mat with me (Now don’t get wrong ideas! I just did most of the stuff like eating, sleeping, reading, praying, chatting, working, etc all those years placing myself comfortably on this mat, and that’s it!)


We all plunged into a ‘clean-the-house’ mode, and saw ourselves running around with brooms, buckets and dust pans. The amused Lima even took time out of it to capture the whole naatak – the only daughter of a too-rich couple, she had never stayed in a hostel, or travelled much in a bus, not to mention cleaning a ganda flat! But just as Sid enjoyed helping Ayesha set up her house, Lima just loved and captured the historic event.


Once the cleaning was all done, we sat down to eat. Just then, I saw paper plates, spoons, aerated drinks, etc etc etc jumping out of a plastic cover beside Lima… “You guys bought these too? I feel like I’m eating in office!


Let me not forget to mention this part about our office – I should actually include an episode on it as well – we just had every single thing required, available in the office. Starting from Kinley bottles , snacks of all varieties, food from all over the world, fruits of all kinds… other requirements like sanitary pads, tea bags, spoons, plates, and what not! We had it all in office. Office was like this all-free supermarket, from which people even freely take things away – though that wasn’t encouraged, much. Hey wait! Where did those stuff from Lima’s plastic bag come?


The wicked smiles on the faces of all nautankies answered my thoughts. The other 4 thought I’d never be partner in such brilliant crimes, and did not want to include me in the operation. When I said, “  Arrre! Why didn’t you tell me of this? I too could have done my share of flickings! We all bursted out laughing. “ Oh man, I guess we’re all so freaking similar in such important things… Mitra exclaimed” I too laughed my heart out, at this discovery. Hehe, who knew there were more discoveries to make before making such biiig conclusions?


Done with cleaning, done with eating, and here we were ready to bless the house. Sandy had thoughtfully bought some holy water with her, so that she’d start living in her new house, warding off any devils there if any.


Prayerfully and dutifully, the task was done, and I saw a naughty smile dawning on the rest of the four faces… “whats up guys?” I was wondering… and Lima duly answered it by taking out a funky bottle from a black plastic bag. “Err… what’s it?” The very innocent me asked. “Vodkaaa hahaha “ came the reply as a thunder from all the four. “Let’s celebrate!”


Fast forwarding 3 years from then, I know now that it isn’t a big deal. Not that I learnt to drink, but I learnt to accept people who drink and got rid of the unconscious hatred I had towards drinkers, smokers, flirts and the rest – whoever. Thanks to the folks I had around me in Hyd, I learnt that just because someone drinks or smokes, they can’t be bad, and at times can be lot better that those who don’t. But back then in my ‘fresher’ days, the sight of the girls going crazy over the evil-looking bottle was something new.


Within me, I just couldn’t believe my eyes and ears, but outside, I managed to say “Oh… you guys enjoy then”. Bhagya couldn’t believe what I said, and she inquired…” Don’t Christians drink for Christmas and all? You should be used to it, come on!” My face saved me though my mind was wonderstruck – I smiled , “ Yeah generally yes, but no one drinks in my family, you guys can go ahead” They asked me again once or something, but was OK with me staying away from it.


Our body is wonderful and weird – I have experienced it forsaking me when I’m mentally ok and confident, and saving my face when I’m internally clueless. I can’t forget a competition where my leg just kept on trembling though I was mentally so very well… and now, my face came to my rescue brilliantly masking the shit going on inside! Hehehe, hope I’m normal.


I went inside my room, unsure of how to behave when a drinks party is on. I should say I was half-smiles, though my mind refused to fully understand the females. “This is new man… wow, this happens?”
The hours ensued saw me gently closing the door of my room and the windows so that the noise of drunken happiness does not go out. Mitra had an epic-full of stories of her drunken adventures, and so had Lima. Sandy and Bhagya seemed to be occasional drinkers, but were fitting in to the company very well. I felt like a clueless, illiterate, ignorant villager on learning about a lot of it, but believe me, I did not feel inferior though.


Enjoying my own company is a skill that I developed back in school, and I am happy I did. Many times in life, you feel that no one can understand you, no one can cry with you, no one can feel the way you feel, and no one can be your best friend, but yourself. Believe me, these are not statements or facts which leads you to being gloomy. In my life, I’d say, learning to be happy with myself is the best gift I ever gave myself. And this ofcourse backed me in the new house too. We all had registered impressions about each other in our minds. Not that we cared to think a lot or analyze them much, but the knowledge that I'm is different, was quite obvious. And no body really bothered.


The 'moving-in' episode brought with it a hand full of lessons - I look back at it with a smile on my face... so many times in life I've experienced life getting geared up to bring in that flood of changes in me... I could hear life whispering in my mind that this, was one of them....

Lottery winning

I, like many others who joined my company was a fresher. Straight out of college, and college hostel – which implies a lot of things. Craving good food, eyes going gol gol at the perspective of some freedom and extra money to spare, etc are a few to mention. My excitement after boarding an aero plane the first time, had not dyed down and here I was, in a plush, cottage looking, cozy Guesthouse, filled with the smartest, young people from all over the country! I reached the guest house late at night, and did not get to meet anyone that day, but I was delighted to see the whole, big room which was for myself! Ahhh! Life had just taken me for an expensive treat!


The room was great… it had a super soft, tempting mattress and pillows, AC, spacious cupboards, phone extension, amazing bathroom which I’ve only seen in TV ads, fooood at my beck and call -  anytime of the day, LG flatron TV and connection with a zillion channels with amazing clarity! The only, slightly tough part was that I had to skip for a long time to locate a mallu channel of my liking! 


I had reached on a Friday night, and so had an entire weekend to get a feel of what it’s like to be in Hyderabad and the guest house, for starters. My first night with Hyderabad wasn’t very exciting as we just got to know each other, but with the assurance and hope that we’ll acquaint with each other better with time and love as well, I went to bed. 


At the breakfast table, newspaper corner, TT court and common TV room, I got to know of the other inmates, who were to join with me. Uhh! How can I forget the terrace! This is from where we got our second – bird’s eye view of Hyd ( the first was from the flight and it sucked big time – just brown coloured squares with occasional colour collogued patches! ) and felt that the city ain’t that bad… though what we felt is that it’s a city of extremes… You have multi-storied plush buildings on either side of the roads and slums in between them! The middle class sect were not to be seen anywhere… and that was where I belonged, back in my home state... 


Amidst all the comforts, I could feel getting pushed to the upper stratum of the society... May be this is what is called 'moving up the ladder' and this is how you feel when you are in the process!

Blind leading the deaf to a potential invention!

It was the first week of my first job, and the first week away from my home state, Kerala. I  was quite excited about getting placed, being able to stay with new people in an apartment as opposed to college hostels, being my own boss in life, earning my own money... and what not. 


Travelling - that too alone - was on top of my fun agenda, as always. But one thing that had been bugging me right from the time I landed in my 'city of job' - Hyderabad,  was nothing else but, Hindi. 


Like any other average mallu, I could handle malayalam and english quite well. I had learnt to read and write Hindi at school, and may be showing off by asking 'Aapka naam kya hai' - that's the maximum - at college. And I could understand 'thoda thoda/kuch kuch', that's it. But Hyd demanded to know hindi well, if I had the intention of travelling alone. 


Well, mallus learn quite fast though. And there we had our dear Kochiite Rufee, fresh off the boat like us all,  donning the role of our 'hindi' teacher. Not that she knew the language all that well - and see, a coach never has to be a good player, as the saying goes. She taught us - the hindi illiterate mallu gals - few words which would come in handy, and can be used in our day to day life. The first set of words included the ones which we'd require to use with taxi and auto drivers, and we welcomed them into our brains with respect and applause. 'Aage se left/right' - which means you know what, 'Waha pe rokiye', 'Gaana lagao', 'kitna hua', 'Sahi daam boliye bhaiya', and a single word, 'maheena', which she said, means time.


I began using most of the words, immediately, and felt quite proud. The only issue was understanding the replies given in heavily accented hindi, by whichever driver I speak to! But nevertheless, I did not give up. 
Once, it was me alone in the car with an office driver, and he had 3 other people to drop home, for which he had to take different inside lanes. I was happy that I got to see the insides of different lanes and learn what existed in there, but as time grew, I kept on asking myself when will I reach home. I decided to ask our driver and yes, it was another chance for me to use an item from my bag of hindi vocab. 


"Bhaiyya, meri ghar pahunchne keliye kitne maheene lagengey?" ( I understand the potential for grammar mistakes in the statement, but, all that matters is whether you understood what I intended to ask ;P )
Out came the question from my mouth, and I saw the face of the driver contorting to make expressions of self-pity and sentences which I did not understand, but had a tone of 'madam-this-is-not-my-fault' feeling. He went on, for around 5 minutes, and later took a glance at my face, which sincerely looked, clueless. What he comprehended from my facial expression in an instant had a metamorphic effect on his mood, and he asked with a dubious smile - 


"Madam, aak kahan se ho"? 


"Kerala"


"Kitni din hua Hyderabad pe?"


"2 weeks"


Hearing my reply, he had an amused, ear-to-ear smile. "Madam, maheena ka matlab hai - month". Gosh! did you get what I had asked him in the urge to know when I would get home? And who can blame him for 'understanding me right' given the situation supported the statement so right? And what got unfolded there was nothing else, but a minor episode of my megaserial of embarassments, in the new city! 


I spotted Rufee the next day in office, walking in my direction, heavily giggling and teary-eyed, within a bunch of friends who were equally struck by some comedy event that she was surely narrating. I ran towards her and mockingly caught hold of her neck saying "you idiot, tell me again what the meaning of the word maheena is."  And there she goes -


"What for?   Did you too use it on someone and get a lecture and questionnaire on why we south indians are hindi illiterate? and why we should have started using the language right after it getting declared, the national language? " My grip on her neck got tightened as I too started laughing with a questionmark on my face."
One of Rufee's admirers said "one of the drivers tried to take Rufee on a guilty 'ride' on this, and she reciprocated "Bhaiyya I'm sorry that I wasn't born at that time to promote it well. Don't worry I'm doing it now." I had to release my hand to hold my stomach from aching, coz of continous laughing. 


I could very well imagine the 'about-to-get slaughtered' look on the driver's face. Well, after all, mallus are good at 'malluficating' even Chinese food, then why not make 'Minglish' out of Malayalam and Hindi? 

Hide and Seek!

“You'll be doing yourself a big favor by not burning your eye lashes and hair if you sit a little away and read. The candle light is flickering violently.” 


I heard it, and as usual, just turned to see mom looking at me with a worried expression on her face. “OK…” my monosyllabic answer and the taking the face a little behind happened for the nth time on the same day. 


Mom just waved her head stating, “ you should try some outdoor games maybe” and walked away muttering “ poor kid”. I was too young to understand why she thought all I had were books as company and that means loneliness to most.


Having finished ‘The Secret Garden’ by Enid Blyton and hoping to see the characters coming alive in my dreams as they always do, I stretched my little spine and stood up. I went beside the door of our living room to check whether dad’s walking towards home from a distance, after work. A glance at the clock said there is still a half an hour to go for his usual time of home coming. I stepped outside and sat on the little stone beside the narrow road, which is my usual point of waiting. Usha didi passed by, exchanging a smile. I opened my mouth to say hello, which got interrupted by her “lots of guests at home re… the dinner isn’t ready yet… waiting for dad? See you…” and off she went.
 These guests are such a nuisance… they come over and make your moms busy, dads too formal, and house a mess. They sleep on your bed, keep chatting away uptil wee hours… Thank God we don’t have guests in our house! 


“Dad will be little late today , he has a meeting” mom said from inside. “Go in then...” I said myself… he can’t be home for another 2 hours then – start off with ‘Around the world in 80 days’! Yay!  


What would it be like if I go around the world like Jules Verne? Introducing myself as different persons in different places – to local folks ofcourse… ‘Hey I’m Nancy and I’m a journalist… Hey I’m Rachel, I’m a photographer… Hey I’m somebody else and is another great-sounding professional… ‘ How will that sound? 


Aren’t people bored of being the same person all thought life? 


“ I’ll blow off that candle if I see you with a book sitting that close to it again.” 
Ahhh! Yeah, you guessed it right!


“Anjali has come to ask whether you can go playing with them… she is outside.”
 “Oh…” This wasn’t expected behavior… why me?
I looked behind and saw the frail looking smart girl coming in saying, “ we don’t have enough people for hide and seek… come play with us.” 


“Ughh… now?” 


Does it matter whether I want to go or not? Doesn’t look like… what matters is there aren’t enough people to play Hide and Seek. 


I got up and went after her, to make my sincere contribution to the troubled lot. All these places of hiding are known to all, what joy do they get out of playing here again?
Game progressed quite well, said the happy faces of all. “I’m gonna count… one, two three…” went on the next. All ran to different directions again. “I’m gonna find the best place to hide”. Anjali proclaimed and ran away. 


Well, I too will then… and I knew I would,  when I found my legs taking me towards my it. As I reahed there and took the Jules Verne story out again and immersed myself in it. The happiness of hiding in another era engulfed me...